01/06/2016

Inaffection: The Absence Part I


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Welcome to book 1 of The DSU. If you want to download and own this in full as an ebook follow the links...



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This is a story in three parts, links forward and backwards will be provided top and bottom. Comment below or tell me what you think at:



For quick introductions we'll start with a synopsis and then jump straight into things...

Alone in a deserted city and with help from a friend, Q contemplates truth and battles disbelief as he tries to find a 'true reality' by way of observing his theoretical physical phenomena to do with the start of creation: the big wave.



Before we start...

This is a story told in the rough form of a screenplay - a movie.

If you've never read a screenplay, you'll need to know the following:

EXT - Exterior. Found in scene headers to indicate we are outside.

INT - Interior. Also found in scene headers, but to indicate we are inside.

(O.S) - Off screen. Found next to character names.

(V.O) - Voice over. Also found next to character names.

(CONT'D) - Continued. Used to indicate continued speech next to character names.

SUPER: - Superimpose. To indicate text is seen over images.

The rest should be self-explanatory.

Enjoy...

FADE IN:

INT. Q'S ROOM - NIGHT

A man, Q, sits recording a video log. The room is dark, there is nothing to see but his tired eyes and light deprived, pale face.

Q

Reality is a human construct. What you are, feel and do is a product of perception.

INT. KITCHEN - MORNING

Q sits on a red sofa eating a bowl of cereal. He faces an old T.V set, staring through the blank screen.

INT. Q'S ROOM - NIGHT

Q

There were forty-nine quintillion people on this earth, in mine and indeed everybody else's perception. This means that there were seven billion people alive on this planet, each with the capacity to feel and give off emotion, to have a sense of self. One person sees another in a subjective manner and each self could have been seen through seven billion perspectives, therefore, there were seven billion squared people on this planet. Forty-nine quintillion people.

He looks down at a piece of paper and touches his next reference point.

Q

Perception and the self are words that communicate ideas via emotional output and reception so that one schema can be attributed to another, between minds. This process is understanding. Not so much one another, but much rather stimuli and oneself.

Q reaches past the camera he's recording on and flicks the light switch on.

The room's lit up. It's practically empty apart from an unmade bed in the corner and the desk Q is sitting at. Everything is layered in a thin veil of dust and neglect.

Q wipes his eyes before continuing:

Q

The self is a projection of adaptation, it's an amalgamation of experiences that span our life and transcend it simultaneously. By nature we are coded, yet blank slates. These slates are filled in as we live, transcribing the self from perception. Because who you are is a product of experience, we are conditioned to adapt in accordance to what the self fundamentally wants. To survive.

INT. Q'S ROOM - DAY

Q sits at his desk scrawling on paper.

INT. Q'S ROOM - NIGHT

Q

Survival is the essence of the self and consciousness, as all we do is driven by this unquenchable thirst. The self must survive in two ways: as a unit and as part of a group. Resultantly, altruism and selflessness do not exist. Instead all behaviour is a means of communicating one's needs in a circumstance. To prompt a response. Furthermore, behavior is absolutely reciprocal and so all actions are meant to induce a reaction.

Q pauses to move some paper on his desk about.

Q

To be human is to be a vessel that only knows its own consciousness, trapped until death extinguishes the light. To be human is to have a self, to experience, to communicate and maybe just to exist. By standard definition, to exists means everything and nothing, an intangible idea, unobservable, lost in an infinite sea. On a scale of characteristics, observable, quantifiable or thinkable, all a human is, all anything that exists is, is plotted at the very midpoint of a scale of comparison, infinity away from the greatest positive and infinity away from the greatest negative.

The bedroom door creaks as it opens a crack. Q looks over his shoulder.

The door clicks shut.

Q looks back toward the camera, shaking his head.

Q

What I've come to understand is a model of the universe, or at least a way of perceiving it, that can show what it means, beyond perception, to exist in a true reality. Currently, as humans, a true reality is what you see when your eyes are closed. An intangible nothing.

Q creates a ball with his fingers then claps his hands together.

Q

However, nothing, by definition, cannot exist. For there to be nothing, there needs to be an absence of everything. For this to happen within our existence, there needs to be a containment of this absence, a something.

Q makes the ball with his fingers again, locks them in place then tries to pull them apart, but to no effect.

Q

There was a big bang, what people for so long have understood to be the start of everything. The start of something from nothing: an impossibility.

INT. Q'S ROOM - DAY

Q sits at his desk with a myriad of screws and small metallic parts around him.

In his hands he holds what looks like a car battery.

INT. Q'S ROOM - NIGHT

Q

As what can only be described as someone in a snap shot of spacetime, I am and I think. There's no tangible covariation between the two in a true reality. There is no therefore. I just am and I just think. To be able to speak in definites I must find and be apart of this true reality. The nature of this true reality is a set of rules. The inescapable truths of the self. Those being, we only strive to survive and do not perceive reality.

Q looks down at his notes.

Q

True reality can be observed from the epicentre or from the outskirts of existence. I will be the first human to observe reality by witnessing the phenomenon I've theorised to be the big wave, as opposed to the big bang. I say there couldn't have been a big bang because the premise relies on the universe being a made from nothing. The big wave is an echo of the production of existences.

Q pushes his notes away and leans forward.

Q

The idea of nothing is absurd, a human tendency to rely on the observable. The big wave exists without space and time, and is instead the essence of creation. It's a pulse without a heart, the epitome of infinite, devoid of nothingness.

He taps his chest.

Q

It traverses our dimensions as a midpoint of it's very being - infinity away from the epicentre and infinity away from the outskirts. In short, the big wave is potential. Infinite potential. What some might consider to be so far stretched it's nothing, but never could anyone ever be more wrong.

Q shakes his head, annoyed. He leans further forward.

Q

To know that the big wave exists and to understand the true reality of our existence I will reach the boundaries of our universe, perceivable as a wave, an atmosphere holding our known dimensions. This will all be in time for what would have been thought of as the big crunch. This will actually be the incorporation of a new wave, alpha, into what would be our perceivable universe. Alpha is what made humans believe that our universe will stop expanding and start shrinking. It's been brewing for a long time now.

He takes a breath and pauses for a moment.

Q

By objectively witnessing the end of the universe as it is, I can know for sure what is true in a world where one cannot rely on his own eyes to tell him the truth.

INT. Q'S ROOM - MORNING

Q sits on his bed, in the very corner, staring into to space.

Thin grey curtains, drawn shut, are the only light source of the room.

All that can be heard is the hum of an offscreen computer...

The door creaks open.

V (O.S)

Come on, let's go.

Q follows V out of the room.

EXT. Q'S BACK GARDEN - MORNING

V and Q stand face to face in the middle of the back garden. Both are unremarkable figures.

This garden is unkempt but not overgrown. They stand in the shadow of a dead ash tree at the bottom of the small garden.

V

Ok, look... I can't stay indoors today. The room is killing me, each time I go in there I get the sense that I'm dying at a faster rate, like time is moving too fast. I find myself wanting to gag each time I take a breath, worst of all, I see you, just sitting in there. I am going out and you are coming with me.

V turns around, pulls himself over the fence, into the neighbour's garden, and walks around the side of the house.

Q huffs then walks through his house and out the front door.

EXT. THE ROAD OUTSIDE Q'S HOUSE - MORNING

The street is completely empty. The suburban neighbourhood stays silent as Q and V walk.

Q

Work's going well, I'm recording all my ideas and I feel close to something new.

V

Need anything from me?

Q

Not right now, but maybe later.

V

What was going on yesterday?

V pokes Q in the head. Q pulls away, unamused.

Q

I had this idea of an aggressive.

V's puzzled.

Q

The idea that behaviour is reciprocal is simple. People strive to be apart of their environment, to have control. But how do we do this? With the aggressive. This is a means of inflicting your own opinion on somebody else in order to make them feel weak, stupid, strong...

V

Give me an example.

Q

The best way I can explain it is with laughter. Why do we laugh?

V

To indicate that something is funny.

Q

No, to appoint weakness. To laugh at someone is to say they've done something they shouldn't have. To laugh with someone is to displace the accusation and appoint weakness to anyone attributable to the punch line. For example, what do you call a boy who stands up to his bullies?

Q leaves a moment of silence. V shakes his head.

Q

An ambulance.

V doesn't laugh.

Q

That was a bad joke but what it's supposed to do is make a listener feel like they misinterpreted the questioning, so then they'll displace any feelings of ineptitude to the punch line of the joke: the little boy.

They step down off the curb and cross the road.

Q

The second part of the joke is what can make it truly funny, dependant on the story and characters involved. That's why comics don't usually just tell one liners, they describe a whole sequence with many little jokes pointing out weaknesses either in themselves or others and then end on one big one that's a summation of those many jokes.

Across the road, V jumps on the curb and walks along it like it's a tightrope.

Q

The more a person can relate to a story the greater it affects their outlook. This adds stakes, characteristics a person must displace and laugh at to displace any accused weakness. Outside of telling jokes and laughing, an aggressive is a means of translating ideas through emotional output - to attack someone's personal outlook.

V

So, what if I'm not using aggression to get my emotions through to you, am I using a passive?

Q

No.

V slips off the curb and jumps back on to the pavement.

V

Then why call it an aggressive?

Q

Because an idea is being translated by way of emotion, you're using your ideas to attack my thought process.

Q pulls at a bush as they pass it, he throws the leaves in the next garden they pass.

V

What if a guy is crying because he's got a gun to his head? He begs to be let go, back to his wife and kids. He can't be using an aggressive, surely it's a passive.

Q

No, for two reasons, it's my theory and so my adjective to choose. And secondly, if the trigger isn't pulled he's successfully managed to attack and alter the gunner's mindset. The man manipulated his behaviour so the gunner would attribute the victim's actions to him being weak, giving him the sense that he could die.

V pulls at the next bush taking the leaves and throwing them at Q. They hit him in the chest, he just wipes them off.

Q

That's all to do with the fact that a mind is programmed to survive in two ways: as a part of a group, society, and as a single unit, alone. Or as Freud would say, the mind is constructed with the id, superego and ego. Within the id are two substructures, thanatos and eros. These are fuels for life, sourced from the idea of death or dying and sex or reproducing, people wanting to live on as part of others, but also for themselves.

V

Why would you feel like you could die though?

Q

Fundamentally, to feel any kind of negative emotion is to understand or be given the sense that you could be killed or at least can die. Contradiction of the outputs of the superego or maybe even eros, to feel like you aren't apart of something bigger, such as a society, makes you feel small. Small animals are hunted and eaten. They are prey.

V

People kill whales.

Q

That's besides the point. People kill whales because they are perceived as prey. Weak enough to be killed.

V

So, if the gunner chooses not to kill this guy, all he has done is remind him that it's a crime to kill and he'll go to prison?

Q nods, yes. They approach the park, V gestures for them to go in.

Q

But, that's in context and too specific of an explanation. The gunner's primary processing thoughts probably outlined that he's making someone feel small and insignificant. Consequently, he'll assume he too will soon be feeling insignificant. Morals are the product of paranoia and imagining the worst consequential situation. This process is catalysed by the aggressive. It's what makes us feel empathy for the weak, or even to feel weak ourselves.

V just cocks his head in agreement.

EXT. THE PARK - MORNING

They walk in silence through the gates, into the park. Like the street there's nobody around.

The park is just a patch patch of grass with a few trees and a ring of concrete around it. Q and V walk around the path.

V

So how does philosophical and psychological theorising help our work? How does the aggressive help to explain the nature of your big wave?

Q

You know... I don't know, well... at least not yet. Maybe the thought just keeps me thinking or maybe... maybe... something...

V smirks then pulls a disgruntled look.

V

Listen, I've been meaning to bring this up for a while--

Q

What is it?

V

If you hadn't interrupted me I'd already be telling you.

Q almost says something but simply groans.

V

Do you think you're my boss?

Q waits a moment expecting V to say something more.

Q

Is that a serious question or is it rhetorical?

V

It's serious.

Q

I'm sorry, what's the question again?

This slightly irritates V.

V

Do you think of yourself as my boss?

Q

What does that mean?

V

Fuck me. It's like talking to a dead moose. Do you look at our relationship as worker and co-worker or boss and employee?

Q

Surely a boss works with an employee and so they are co-workers.

V

Answer the question.

Q

There is no question, at least not one worth answering. Nobody is getting paid here and it's not like we are putting ourselves out doing this. Do you have better things to do?

V

Of course not, but I'm simply trying to find out whether you feel some kind of hierarchy of intelligence or purpose between us.

Q

What a stupid thing to ask. You're just projecting anxiety all over me. I'm not going to answer that bullshit.

V shrugs, dropping the question, eyebrows raised. Q shakes his head.

Q

Oh, and by the way, I do think you look fat in that dress.

V puts his hands up and drifts off to the side a little.

Q

Ok, let me ask you this, if I said yes, would that have really been a bad thing? I mean, you only asked because you're feeling some kind of dissonance on the subject of what we seem to be.

V pulls a sullen look that fades into vacancy.

Q

We're not a married couple. We don't need to have quality communication time. We're grown men. You sit on the sofa and scratch your balls, and if I'm honest I don't need reminding that you have cock and balls when I'm eating breakfast. But, each morning I say nothing and you scratch away. Why? Two reasons. I don't need you thinking that I have a problem with something so trivial as you pushing your testicles about, but also, does anyone need more anxiety? Anxieties are what make a brother pull his sister's hair, one country drop bombs on another, people wear clothes, watch T.V--

V

You commit your life to your own pseudo science.

Q

(without hesitation)

Yes, anxiety keeps the cat curious.

V

And about to suffocate in a plastic bag because it thinks there's something to eat in there.

Q

Sure.

V

But what does that mean? Could I, or maybe, would Freud say that a cat is under the thumb of its own thanatos?

Q

I don't know, you have to consider questions concerning levels of consciousness and intelligence, comparable consciousness and intelligence to a human.

V

Well, to be conscious must fundamentally mean that something can perceive.

Q

Maybe. But could you outline what it means to not be conscious? What it feels like?

V

You mean, like a dream?

Q

No.

V

Why not?

Q pauses for a second to think.

Q

Because to be asleep, to dream, is to be unconscious.

V

All that means is that electricity is flowing throughout our nerves and brain tissue, causing and being caused by chemical reactions. If a brain does this in a controlled, sensical way when we are awake then it's doing it in a nonsensical way when we sleep. During REM, brain activity increases making the process even more nonsensical and less comparable to normal consciousness.

Q

No. If that were true then anything with electrons has consciousness.

V

I can't accept that.

Q

Ok, then anything with current flowing through it has some level of consciousness, possibly comparable to the preconscious and subconsciousness experience during sleep. Or even the unconsciousness we don't experience as we are awake. You know, what you must thank for being able to breathe, walk and feel.

V

But, what you're saying doesn't go against what I've said, you've simply opened up the idea of consciousness to anything with atoms. Now you're not asking me what it feels like to be conscious or unconscious likewise. The question, again, now is, what is consciousness? What does it truly mean to be a conscious being?

Q

Ok... so the argument is that sleep may be a somewhat comparable alternative to consciousness, much like the simple presence of electric current or electrons. But, only possibly. I could argue that consciousness is simply circumstantial, very circumstantial, and the chemistry and, or, the physiology of the brain and body provide an incredibly specific circumstance in which, what we experience consciousness to be, can exist.

V

It's quite key that you said consciousness that we experience, but to your point alone. Again, we reach a question of alternative or different states of consciousness in things other than ourselves. Maybe it's not unthinkable to speculate that everything that is, is aware of some kind of being, with varying substance. Could the universe be more conscious than us?

Q

To have said that, you've personified the universe, you've dispositionally attributed higher levels of consciousness to a bigger thing. Fundamentally, that's wrong, it's a fundamental attributional error to say the least. Could the atom be our proverbial mastermind? Would it not make more sense for everything that seems to make up everything to understand, I don't know, everything!

V

Whoa! Please stop yourself, you sound stupid. Like ninety-eight or ninety-nine percent of the universe is thought to be, for all intents and purposes, empty. Come on, you must have heard someone say you could fit the whole human race in a sugar cube. All seven billion of us. And don't start with the whole seven billion squared thing again.

Q's attention drifts from the conversation slightly.

Q

Whatever... so, um, consciousness...

(finds the conversation again)

... err, yes... if atoms or maybe even the quanta of the quanta of quarks--I don't think that makes sense...

(lost again)

But my point is, could consciousness be the centre and cause of the universe, the fuel of the pulsating big waves, the substance and the essence of what creates?

V

It just sounds like you're trying to put humans at the centre of the universe.

Q offers no response beyond a light grunt.

They walk in silence a moment.

V

Anyways... have you ever imagined what it takes to be a dog sitting at home all day in the same spot doing nothing but breathe and eat?

Q

(laughs)

I don't know...

INT. Q'S KITCHEN - MIDDAY

On the worn down but seemingly clean red sofa in the middle of the kitchen, Q and V face the T.V that's turned off.

A tap drip... drip... drip... drips...

The kitchen, like the rest of the home, isn't dirty but hasn't been looked after well.

The white paint on the cupboards is peeling and turning yellow. The black and white lino floors are dusty. The refrigerator is scratched, silver lines etched in the red paint. Especially at the bottom.

After a moment of inertia, V's animated.

V

You know Cinderella?

After a pause, Q's eyes slip from the T.V.

Q

(stretching)

Yeah, you watched it again yesterday?

V

It's not a fantasy or romance, it's not even a kid's film, you know.

Q

What, Cinderella?

V

It's a psychological piece of artwork. A masterpiece.

Q

No.

V

Fuck yes!

Q sighs with a smile.

Q

Go on...

V

So, let's start with the animals: the birds, the horse, Lucifer, Gus, Jaq, the other mice and Bruno. They are all projections of Cinderella's repressed psyche. Lucifer is an obvious one, he represents what Cinderella sees her stepmother as. On the whole, evil. But, to Cinderella's father, she started out as what could have been the perfect woman. Just as Lucifer was a perfect angel. However, Lucifer fell to earth as the devil. That can be likened to the stepmother's true colours of greed and general gold-diggerness being revealed to Cinderella after her father died, or maybe went back, maybe even stayed, in a metaphorical heaven. I'm not saying Cinderella's father was God, but she did take a lot of shit throughout her life and so did Jesus. Anyway, after some time of the engagement or marriage, Lucifer, A.K.A the devil, becomes the beast, or in this case: a cat. Cinderella has a lot of dissonance about this point. Is the devil, the stepmother, only in a visible form on earth as to steal human worship from the true God, Cinderella's father? Or does Cinderella look at the beast before her simply as a fallen angel? Hence, forgiving her stepmother--just like Jesus himself would.

(straight on to the next point:)

The horse, Major, and the dog, Bruno, are Cinderella's representations of her father. He was possibly an army man, hence the name Major for the horse. He was also a man in tune with his senses or maybe just sense, you know, the dog, Bruno, was a bloodhound. Cinderella chooses to see him like this because she can attach her model father to the pets that he got her when she was young. Those that stayed with her as her only protection and friends. These characters seem pretty old, maybe a bit senile, the horse has grey hair and Bruno always seems a little groggy, much like the father would be if he lived until then, but most importantly they have this underlying anger, especially Bruno, her father's sense, that is aimed toward--you guessed it--Lucifer, the stepmother. These two animals help Cinderella remember her father as a loving friend. They also lead her to believe her father would be outraged to learn the truth about the woman he truly married and left his daughter to. The birds are both a projection of Cinderella's mother and Cinderella herself--but as a young woman grown up with the influences of her mother. In the introduction to the film we see them fluttering around as we learn that Cinderella's mother had died and her father was in search of a new wife. This implies that she is ever present, possibly watching over the father and Cinderella. These birds wake Cinderella up in the morning, help her get dressed, like a mother may. But, the most touching thing we learn about these birds is that they are proud and mesmerised by Cinderella's singing, a characteristic birds are known for. This shows that Cinderella believes that her mother truly adores the daughter she left behind. This is further reinforced by how much they help in making Cinderella's first dress and letting her out of her locked room in the end of the film. These birds are Cinderella's emotional backbone, they get her through the movie and also shape her as a female. The mice are all characters in themselves because they are the different ways Cinderella sees herself. As a fighter, with Gus--as well as a little naive. A productive worker with the female mice, a little sexist but what can I do about it. And incredibly brave as well as clever with Jaq. These mice represent every ounce of true substance Cinderella has. She isn't just the poor girl who got Prince Charming. She is a tortured mind. The film is about a psychological coming of age in Cinderella being able to fully mature and meet a man that's nearly as good as her. I mean, what could she do? The prince was as good as it got in that kingdom. Anyway, that's all to overcome psychological oppression. That's why scenes like the dress making one aren't nonsensical, but metaphors for resilience and...

(looks to the inattentive Q)

... mind over matter... I could go on for two hours more, but I seem to be losing you.

Q snaps into attention.

Q

Yeah, you should write a book. Look I've got...

He stands and walks out the room, mind churning. V seems to be used to it.

V

(to himself)

Man, I love Cinderella...

(sighs)

What I'd do for her to be a real woman...

He sits back, staring into the blank T.V screen again.

INT. Q'S KITCHEN - EVENING

V's making a cup of tea when he hears the footsteps of Q come thundering down the stairs.

Q

(bursting into the room)

I've got something!

INT. BATH AND SHOWER STORE - EVENING

V has convinced the owner, MAX, of the small shop to stay open for a few more minutes so he can buy something.

MAX

Come on then, what is it you want, a sink locknut, shower head, some washers for a broken tap?

V

I need a bath tub.

MAX

That's quite a big item, it's not going to be quick to process or easy to get out of the store. Come back tomorrow and my nephew will be here, he can help you bring it to your car or better still we can deliver it to your home in a few days.

V

I appreciate that, but I need a bath today.

MAX

Why would you need a bathtub at this time of day? You don't smell too bad.

Max starts to laugh but V is having none of it.

V

Max, look, I know what I've come for, I know what the time is and I know you don't want to be here all night so let's get going.

MAX

Ok, down to it. We have three types of bathtub on sale. We've got this square single end one here...

Max gestures over to a bathtub. V doesn't look at it.

V

Yep, I'll take this one.

MAX

Are you sure? We've got these two others back here?

V

Nope. This will do. How much?

MAX

Well... it's one, fifty. That's more than half price off. It does require side panels that are sold separately though.

V

I've got one seventy and I don't want the side panels. How about I give you this and you let me take this tub here, right now? Simply done. We both get to go home.

MAX

Are you crazy? This is a model we put on for show--anyway, all of the parts aren't attached right now. This is absurd, how do you think you're going to install the bath in your home?

V

Don't worry about it, just take the money and I'll deal with it.

MAX

You seriously don't think I'm going to sell you this?

V stares at him blankly, money in hand.

EXT. OUTSIDE THE BATH AND SHOWER STORE - EVENING

V drags the bathtub out of the store and continues dragging it down the road.

There is nobody around.

INT. Q'S HOME - NIGHT

Q paces around the sofa.

V pushes through the front door and into the empty living room dragging a now very scratched bathtub.

THUNK

He drops the tub, completely worn out, and lays in it.

Q

What took you so long? Ah, forget it, you're here now, let's get started.

Q walks out of the backdoor but soon re-enters with the garden hose. He pulls it through the kitchen into the living room.

Q

(feeding the hose into to the tub)

Come on, get out, the hose is going on.

V jumps out.

Q repositions the tub into a circle marked out on the carpet with tape. He then goes out the back door again to turn the hose on.

V

(running to the kitchen sink)

Fucking, turn it off you idiot! There's no plug in the hole. Water's going everywhere!

Q

(walking back into the room)

I told you to get a tub without a hole!

The water is still running, soaking the brown carpet.

V rips the plug from the chain attached to the sink and puts it into the bathtub, stopping the water from flowing out the hole.

V

(laughing)

Well... I don't know, shit happens.

Q

(sighs)

All right, let's get on with it.

V

Remind me again why we couldn't use the bathtub in the bathroom upstairs.

Q

We're not going to rip a perfectly good tub out of the bathroom.

V

Ok, so what's next?

Q

We fill the bath up with water and we put the lead and and the tin you picked up last week into the tub.

V

So we've got some waiting to whilst the tub fills up then.

Q

Yep. Just don't be expecting some magnificent reaction when the lead and tin go in, this isn't a chemistry class.

V

No, this is fucked up.

INT. Q'S ROOM - NIGHT

Q is scribbling furiously on some paper, he has been all night.

He stops, looks up and turns on his camera to submit another video log.

Q

The nature of everything seems to be to fall apart, to become something different, more complex, less organised. Our universe is stricken by this entropic tendency that makes each moment more incomprehensible than the last. To understand all that is, do we need time to stop, or reverse? If space did return to a simpler state would all that entropy just be condensed into an equally incomprehensible entity that has all that humans can't seem to fathom tightly concentrated? Could it be that the epicentre of the big wave is this very entity that is shedding its mass in the form of our universe? Could we be the product of atrophy? My life when compared to all that is, is infinitely small yet infinitely big. But still I perceive size--yes some infinities are smaller than others, but I can't begin to imagine why infinity exists. Could I simply dismiss it at as product of human perception? Is infinity a way of understanding that to quantify we need an ambiguous scale that stretches forever positively and negatively? Science is what all people depend on as a reliable source of knowledge, but is the human mind really capable of perceiving truth? With all my being I want to say no, but what makes me so different from every other human?

Q stops with a sigh, placing his face in his hands before rubbing his eyes.

Q

These logs are supposed to give answers but I've only got questions right now, so, I don't know... sometimes...

Q turns the camera away from himself and starts scribbling again.

All is silent apart from the scratch of pencil on paper.

INT. Q'S ROOM - MORNING

Mouth open and drooling, Q sleeps in his bed.

V bursts in and shakes him awake.

V

It worked! The water, the lead, the tin, gone! The bathtub is filled up with grass and mud!

He drags the half-conscious Q out of bed.

INT. THE LIVING ROOM - MORNING

They stand before the tub.

Q

I had no idea that so much would go. How could the process have been so accurate? I thought the whole house would be affected, not just this specific spot.

V

I'm sorry, but are you crazy? We can worry why this happened later. I'm going the second point of exchange.

V runs out the front door, Q follows scratching his neck.

EXT. OUTSIDE Q'S HOUSE - SAME

V speed walks down the street toward the park, Q still follows.

The street is completely empty, totally silent.

Q talks to V's back as they go:

Q

It's clear that not just light can be a wave as well as a particle, but... so can all particles... given the right conditions. And I'm not talking about electrons diffracting. The alpha wave must be more out of phase with spacetime than I thought... because the point of superposition is so concentrated. I thought there was a good chance that the whole room would have been gone this morning. But, only the contents of the bath? If the second point of superposition, the next primary exchange point, was supposed to be a couple of thousand light years away from the house I can't imagine where it actually is now...

V starts running as he sees the entrance of the park, Q speeds up to keep with him.

EXT. THE PARK - MORNING

They run in, scanning the grass.

V

Where is it? There's no hole.

Q

Of course there is.

V

Why would there be? The amount of mass exchanged changed. Why would the point of exchange not be changed?

Q

It has, but not by much. At least... I don't think it should have been. The points are too close for drastic change.

V and Q walk around the park haphazardly for a moment.

The ground beneath V's feet gives away, he falls into a hole about a metre deep.

V

Oh, shit. This is it!

Q runs over.

Q

Are you hurt?

V

No, I'm fine.

Q gives V a hand out of the ditch. They both stand and stare at lead and tin blocks in the wet hole.


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